Why a break up doesn’t need to break you
Why breaking up doesn’t equal the end of the world...
Sun, 8 Apr 2012 - 6:17pm
Break ups are emotional. You may feel angry, heartache or sadness. No-one wants to go through them and the loss of the other half can give you stress, but it won’t be long before you see the light at the end of the tunnel...
When you’ve ended a relationship, embrace how you feel. Get all your feelings out, whether you’re out with friends or putting yourself under house arrest. Make sure you talk about your feelings with others, even if it means repeating yourself. You need to get everything out, cry, rant, scream to your heart’s content! It’s the only time you’re allowed to do it!
Always remember to give yourself that all important space, and not just from your ex. Spend an afternoon free from all contact. This means your phone, computer and even the postman! Having time by yourself doing the things you love, whether it’s watching films or listening to music, will give you some calm.
Once you’ve devoured all the ice-cream in the vicinity, watched and re-watched your top ten soppy films and ripped up all photographs, you’re over the first hurdle. Soon you will be noticing all the great changes in your life...
More time with your friends and family
This falls under the common ‘Yes’ method. Just say “yes” to anything that comes your way! Family barbecues, drinks with friends, going to the cinema, all invitations should have a “yes” answer (unless you’re so popular and you’ll be double-booking yourself that is).
The freedom to do whatever you want, whenever you want will never get old. This can be shameless and guilt-free flirting with total strangers that will do wonders for your self-esteem. Or heading on spontaneous outings without having to consult the other half. Just make sure you keep it all innocent.
You can do all those little things you couldn’t do before
It’s all you you you now! Be selfish and embrace all the little things you could never do before. You could go for a whole new look that the other half never liked the sound of or simply say and do everything he/she never liked about you. And the best thing? You can watch re-runs of your favourite girly sitcoms stress-free!
Learn to love yourself again
The break-up would have left you vulnerable, especially when it comes to the question of ‘why?’. You can start to doubt yourself. But all this time for yourself will give you time to love yourself again, and not why another loved you. You can set up future goals, go for a massage or simply pamper yourself for an afternoon every week because you can and you have time to.
Big life changes
If you ever wanted to move away or change career but your relationship was too settled for you to give it a second thought, now’s the time! If you lived with your ex, why not bite the bullet and offer to move out and start afresh.
Out with the old
By all means, keep a little something, but you don’t need constant reminders of your ex and your relationship. Whether you’re angry or sad, you will have strong emotions, and having mementos around will ignite them.
You have time to stay active and become fit and healthy again. No more lounging in front of the telly and scoffing at restaurants. You’re a brand new you. And just think of their face if you were to ever bump into them, priceless!
All these factors contribute to you finding yourself and happiness again. Here are ten inspirational women who show us that we’ll still live on:
Rihanna split up with Chris Brown in 2009 after he assaulted her. Although their most recent musical collaborations have caused controversy, she is still one of the most popular pop artists in the world.
Jennifer Anniston and Brad Pitt’s relationship was never far from the papers, so it made sense their divorce was well-documented too. Team Jen and Team Ange was swiftly born and Jennifer still has her glittering career and show biz pals.
Katy Perry and Russell Brand recently split after an array of rumours but that didn’t stop her glittering music career. Katy’s recent single is currently number 4 in the Top 40 UK singles chart.
There were many cheating rumours surrounding Demi’s relationship with Ashton Kutcher. Poor Demi went into rehab, but we hear she’s making a swift recovery.
After seven years of marriage, this pair called it quits. But her role as producer and host on Project Runaway lives on.
Jennifer Biel and Justin Timberlake have recently announced their engagement despite years of on off dating, and a baby might be on the way too...
Courtney Cox and David Arquette were one of Hollywood’s best loved couples before separating after 11 years of marriage. Courtney went on to front the lead in hit US sitcom Cougar Town.
Sandra Bullock’s break-up with Jesse James wasn’t free from controversy after he cheated on her. Sandra went on to adopt her gorgeous son Louis and rumour-mill is talking about a second...
Madonna was married to Guy Ritche for eight years before splitting up in 2008. She has just released her 12th album and sell out tour.
Anne bounce back after her romance with dodgy dealer Raffaello Follieri fell apart after he pleaded guilty to multiple charges of scamming others out of millions of dollars.